Smith Family Ice Cream Scoop: Deep Thoughts by Jack Ha... I mean, Me.

Sunday, September 13, 2009

Deep Thoughts by Jack Ha... I mean, Me.

This last weekend we went to Brandon's cousin Brittney's funeral... it was a sad day, but a good remembrance of a wonderful life. This girl is one of the bravest, happiest, strongest people I have ever known. She battled cancer for over 5 years, and it never took her spirit and hope. I am determined to follow her example better. I know I'll never reach her level, but if she can endure what she endured with a smile, I should be able to whine a little less, right? I made her one of my quilted bag things, and I was told by a few people how much she loved it, and how her tubes fit perfectly in it... apparently she was a stylish cancer patient. ;) I am so glad that I could do that one little thing for her, but wish I could've done a lot more... it's hard to feel so helpless when you see others suffer so much.

I had a good conversation with my dad-in-law, and one of the things we talked about was one of the presidents in his ward (he's the bishop) who he said was sensitive to the spirit. It got me thinking and worrying afterward. Am I UNsensitive to the spirit? I feel like I have good feelings about things, particularly related to my calling, and then it doesn't turn out the way that I expect, or turn out at all... and I'm left feeling frustrated, and I start doubting myself and my answers to prayer. Do any of you have any insight for me?

On a lighter note... ummm... can't think of anything. I just thought I should lighten things up a bit, but I'm blank. ;)

4 comments:

Becky said...: First you don't give yourself enough credit. You are a beautiful daughter of God. You are blessed with talents that help serve others. By sharing your talents you share joy with the people around you. Self-doubt has no place in your world. Focusing on the joy of life is less time consuming then doubting every part of your life. Mindy your smile lights up rooms your hugs give comfort you are sensitive to the spirit. If you weren't you wouldn't worry that its not a part of your life. Embrace your life as a crazy beautiful adventure and stop trying to plan it out perfectly. Again that is far to stressful and time consuming. In your moments of frustration give your stress to Christ tell him that you can't handle, but you know he understands and he will guide you through this moment of turmoil. You are very loved and valued. I would challenge you to love yourself as much as you love others. You deserve your love. I love you Mindy Smith!; 8:55 PM
Shannon said...: Ditto to everything Becky said! I'm sorry for your loss Mindy... I hope life clears up a bit for you in the coming days.

The only advice I'll offer is to go read F. Enzio Busche's BYU Devotional talk "Unleashing the Dormant Spirit" (1996) - google BYU speeches to find it. It's quite possibly my most favorite talk ever.

Love ya!; 9:54 PM
haley said...: here is my thoughts for you.... um, when you find the answer send it my way. i know how you feel right now... i think... but on a BRIGHTER note (cause you wanted one) i think you should make a calendar for marci's show and take orders for it. your photography amazes me and i don't know that i could pick just one print i want in my house... but a calendar... so there is my wonderful idea for you. they don't cost that much to have done, you could order it from costco or kenny's and me or marci could pick it up for you before the show and then you could just take orders so you don't have to worry about how many to order before hand. can't wait to see you NEXT weekend!!!
-haley
ps- i found a surprise for you... what hard and red and i think pink inside??? it may need a little fabreeze, but i had to buy it for you when i saw the price!!! are you excited yet?; 9:02 AM
Those Darn Calls said...: Do you remember at Youth Conference many years ago, we had the opportunity to hear John Bytheway give his talk about what we carry in our backpack? I just bought the cd and we listened to it on the way home from a temple trip. In his talk he says that the road is hard, and it always will be. But we make it harder by loading up our "pack" with unnecessary burdens by doubting our worthiness. Heavenly Father has told us over and over how special we are, why don't we believe him? He is God, after all. Stop doubting yourself, you can do it and you can do it well.

Love ya, Mindy.; 1:35 PM

To Do Today

* Embrace this day with an enthusiastic welcome, no matter how it looks. The covenant with God to which you are true enables you to become enlightened by him, and nothing is impossible for you.
* When you are physically sick, tired, or in despair, steer your thoughts away from yourself and direct them, in gratitude and love, toward God.
* In your life there have to be challenges. They will either bring you closer to God and therefore make you stronger, or they can destroy you. But you make the decision of which road you take.
* First and foremost, you are a spirit child of God. If you neglect to feed your spirit, you will reap unhappiness. Don't permit anything to detract you from this awareness.
* You cannot communicate with God unless you have first sacrificed your self-oriented natural man and have brought yourself into the lower levels of meekness, to become acceptable for the Light of Christ.
* Put all frustrations, hurt feelings, and grumblings into the perspective of your eternal hope. Light will flow into your soul.
* Pause to ponder the suffering Christ felt in the Garden of Gethsemane. In the awareness of the depth of gratitude for him, you appreciate every opportunity to show your love for him by diligently serving in his Church.
* God knows that you are not perfect. As you suffer about your imperfections, he will give you comfort and suggestions of where to improve.
* God knows better than you what you need. He always attempts to speak to you. Listen, and follow the uncomfortable suggestions that he makes to us--everything will fall into its place.
* Avoid any fear like your worst enemy, but magnify your fear about the consequences of sin.
* When you cannot love someone, look into that person's eyes long enough to find the hidden rudiments of the child of God in him.
* Never judge anyone. When you accept this, you will be freed. In the case of your own children or subordinates, where you have the responsibility to judge, help them to become their own judges.
* If someone hurts you so much that your feelings seem to choke you, forgive and you will be free again.
* Avoid at all cost any pessimistic, negative, or criticizing thoughts. If you cannot cut them out, they will do you harm. On the road toward salvation, let questions arise but never doubts. If something is wrong, God will give you clarity but never doubts.
* Avoid rush and haste and uncontrolled words. Divine light develops in places of peace and quiet. Be aware of that as you enter places of worship.
* Be not so much concerned about what you do, but do what you do with all your heart, might, and strength. In thoroughness is satisfaction.
* You want to be good and to do good. That is commendable. But the greatest achievement that can be reached in our lives is to be under the complete influence of the Holy Ghost. Then he will teach us what is really good and necessary to do.
* The pain of sacrifice lasts only one moment. It is the fear of the pain of sacrifice that makes you hesitate to do it.
* Be grateful for every opportunity to serve. It helps you more than those you serve.
* And finally, when you are compelled to give up something or when things that are dear to you are withdrawn from you, know that this is your lesson to be learned right now. But know also that, as you are learning this lesson, God wants to give you something better.

from "Unleashing the Dormant Spirit by F. Enzio Busche